Glenn Slaby

How wonderful that we have met with a paradox. Now we have some hope of making progress (Niels Bohr).

Well, the way of paradoxes is the way of truth. To test reality we must see it on the tight rope. When the verities become acrobats, we can judge them (Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray).

As in the originally Ten Commandments given to Moses on Mount Sinai, the Paradoxical Commandments below should not be necessary, nor needed in a stable, secure society, if that society/culture has any form of decency and self-respect toward its own members but humanity’s frailties of greed, insecurity, self-interest have always dominated.

Anyway: The Paradoxical Commandments

People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered.
Love them anyway.

If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.
Do good anyway.

If you are successful, you will win false friends and true enemies.
Succeed anyway.

The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow.
Do good anyway.

Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable.
Be honest and frank anyway.

The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds.
Think big anyway.

People favor underdogs but follow only top dogs.
Fight for a few underdogs anyway.

What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
Build anyway.

People really need help but may attack you if you do help them.
Help people anyway.

Give the world the best you have and you’ll get kicked in the teeth.
Give the world the best you have anyway (Dr. Kent M. Keith).

Gluttony, self-indulgence, by the few, as seen in my prior post, (The Village of 100), is slowly destroying everyone. Everything, for today, the future, obliterating so much including the great deeds, accomplishments, sacrifices of those who thought beyond the self. There are the poor without the ability to change their own world. Yet, there are still those who can make the larger, the smaller individual decisions. They are us who have the power to transform everything, every one by simply believing in the power and influence of the self. We are the one’s whom Paradoxical Commandments apply. We have that ability.

Personally, at times, I have difficulty in seeing the purpose in doing good, in trying to be myself in a world, a society that can be destroyed in an instant, devastated in just a few years, or forgotten as in the empires and cultures of the world’s past.

The forgotten people, families, communities struggled with the same worries and concerns, of health, food, economic survival, the security of the family unit. They, their homes, villages, cities have returned to the soil from hence all arisen, only for the eyes of the archeologists to piece together. Strangers handling the bones of souls with names long forgotten. Who sees, benefits today from the efforts of helping, doing good, after 10, 20 years, centuries? Does anything really matter?

On the contrary.

Maybe, trying to change the world is not the point. Maybe, the physical world is not the point after all. Life is. We will be gone, along with our achievements, hopes, fears, loves, our names, in just a few generations, if we are that lucky. Proving we are greater than our physical presence, is the desire to do something that we know will not make a difference in the greater scheme of this world. This desire to do something, big or small, with little consequence in the sometimes unmovable path of history, displays an unseen, ingrained gift, proving we have a universal connection to each other, to the neighbor, the stranger, to and toward the Center – God.

Helping one person might not change the world, but it could change the world for one person (Anonymous).

Every soul is the point. All Souls.  The world is just a small piece of reality, a reality we must preserve at any cost, but not at the cost of a soul.

Therefore

The Great Perverse

Only

Until I do

My Soul’s Truth

Something Happens.

Something inside changes,

Then the World changes, suddenly.

The World in me, in the other, in the unseen.

Inglorious, delicious. In spite – of our human frailties and evils.

Evil, Pain, Hate

Conquered

By

Finding

The Hidden Self

Soul’s Profound Truth

Doing, Giving, Imagining

The Real World Shifts, Forward

By Not Trying to Change the World.

I alone cannot change the world, but I can cast a stone across the waters to create many ripples( Saint Teresa of Calcutta).

Because of these desires to do good when the effects of doing good may be awkward, difficult, troublesome, even painful and forgotten, unseen, impractical, only enhances the belief of existence greater than the individual, greater than the physical, for something unseen and invisible is touched. We can call it the Soul. The Soul of the person, the Soul of the Greater unseen. The Soul of the great Communion of all Faiths leading to love – to God.

To live fully, one must be free, but to be free one must give up security. Therefore, to live one must be ready to die. How’s that for a paradox? (Tom Robbins).

The Saints of our faith, every faith, past, present, to come – know this. They lived by this paradox, going against the grain of human nature’s unholy self-interest. Through their own fallibilities, brokenness, they discovered something greater and in return were scorn, mocked, suffered, degraded, tortured, and faced death. Yet persisted.

The Paradoxical Commandments relates not just to our own times, but reflect the history of humanity.

By these commandments:

• We must be aware of but not controlled by the impermanence of our time and things.
• We must be aware of the eternity of time in which we exist and the eternity of the invisible realm residing outside our realm of visible existence.
• We must care not if we fail, only if we do not try. Care only if we are not truly honest. Care only if we truly try, letting our actions be for the soul’s reasons.
• We must hopefully find our meaning, through the encumbrances and the harsh difficulties of life and being your true self. Your soul’s purpose. How few have that opportunity.

This above all: to thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day (Hamlet, Act-1, Scene-III, 78–82).

We must not be affected nor limited by our impermanence nor the shortness of our physical sojourn nor by the importance of being everlasting – our name and deeds carved in stone and, carried forward through history’s eternity.

Everyone matters. The smaller their footprint, the greater the importance. Remember, Jesus directs his apostles to the old woman giving her two copper coins at the temple’s offering. (Mark 12:41–44. Luke 21). If only I. Courage, love, faith.

Humanity’s ego, of the individual, of culture/society, maybe the most self-destructive possession unto themselves and others. Do not let the result of having your good deeds, actions condemned, deflected from your true purpose of doing what is good.

Be the change that you wish to see in the world (Mahatma Gandhi).

The difficulty is, our talents and gifts are deeply hidden not presenting themselves as readily as wished.

Let each reach their own heights, by their individual gifts. We have talents to discover, skills to share, not to bury. Do not equate to another’s. Do not judge.

Let the gifts of our knowing our souls to be presented to all. Let the genius of our imaginations soar. We can soar. We are eternal. We are all children of the same, one God.

We are human.

This article first appeared in The Catholic Stand.

As Children of God, we can no longer ignore the lives of our fellow Children of God. So, how do we fulfill our obligations to neighbors we shall never meet – in this life? First, we must view, understand this world containing multiple complexities of social, economic, governmental systems. Our world’s interconnection cannot be ignored any longer. We are all neighbors.

We must speak of man’s rights. Man has the right to live.  He has the right to bodily integrity and to the means necessary for the proper development of life, particularly food, clothing, shelter, medical care, rest, and, finally, the necessary social services. In consequence, he has the right to  be looked after in the event of ill health; disability stemming from his work;  widowhood; old age; enforced unemployment; or whenever through no fault of his  own he is deprived of the means of livelihood. (St. John XXIII, Peace on Earth [Pacem in Terris], no. 11)

In 1990, Dartmouth Professor Donella Meadows wrote an article titled, “State of the Village Report”, with the intent of displaying, for greater understanding, our world as a village of 100 people. In a glance, all can see the disgraceful condition of humanity, the misery, dejection, so many experiences, and the ignorance of others.  Fortunately, we cannot see the tears of God in our blindness.

Our responsibility? Become aware, discuss, educate others. Somehow, act.

The World as a Village of 100*

Closing on eight billion brothers and sisters, I am presenting a mixture of data to ponder, reflect, and share. The only way I can try to improve our state of this small blue sphere – via information and knowledge. Applying, integrating data from various sources, I present the vision of our village. A composite presenting an understanding of our good fortune and the sorrow of many. This community, 100 individuals, would look something like this…

The Basics

Ethnicity

• 61 Asians
• 13 Africans
• 12 Europeans
• 8 North Americans
• 5 South Americans & the Caribbean
• 1 from Oceania

Age and Gender

• 26 would be under 14 years old.
• 8 are 65 years and over
• 50 male, 50 female
• 10 LGBTQ.

Religion

• 33 are Christian
• 21 Muslims
• 13 Hindus
• 11 other
• 11 non-religious
•  6 Buddhists
• 3 Atheists
•  1 Jewish
•  1 Sikh.

Skin Color

• 70 non-white
• 30 white.

Languages

• 17 speak Mandarin Chinese
•   9 English
•   8 Hindi
•   6 Russian
•   6 Spanish
•   4 Arabic
• 50 speak other languages of the 6,000 idioms languages spoken on our only home.

The Tragedies*

 He will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me’ (Matthew 25:45).

Food

• 50 would be malnourished
• 30 would always have enough (15 would be overweight)
• 20 would be undernourished (1 would be dying of starvation)

Freedoms

• 52 can speak, act according to faith & conscience, without fear of imprisonment, torture or death
• 48 cannot and must beware of whom they speak, where they speak, what they read, when to pray
• 20 would live in fear of death via bombing, armed attack, landmines, rape or kidnapping by armed groups
• 50 in the village would distrust their government.

Education and Technology

• 12 are unable to read this message
• 1 has a college degree
• 12 own a computer
• 77 use mobile phones, unequally distributed, some have 2 or more, others none
• 33 would be Internet users
• 15 would have home Internet connections
• 12 would be active users of Facebook
• Twenty consume 80% of the available energy. Eighty would consume 20% of remaining power.

Health and Living Condition

• 80 live in substandard housing
• 44 have no basic sanitation
• 32 breathe polluted air
• 20 have no clean, safe water to drink
• 1 adult has HIV/AIDS (70 million of our family)

In one year, 1 person will die, 2 babies are born. Year’s end there would be 101villagers. How many are disabled? How many receive proper care?

Employment

• 43 work in the service sector
• 36 in agriculture
• 21 in industry
• 10 of the above would be unemployed at some time
• 3 of the above would be migrants, internally displaced persons, and/or refugees.

Money and Wealth

• 59% of the world’s wealth owned by 6 people (all from the US)
• 39% of the world’s wealth is possessed by 74 people
• 20 people share the remaining 2% of the world’s wealth
• The villagers have 11 cars/light trucks unequally distributed
• The village spends $1.24 trillion (US$) on military expenditures
• If you have money in the bank, in your wallet, spare change, places you within the 8 richest
• If you have food in a refrigerator, clothes in a closet, a bed, and a roof, you are richer than 75 people.

Geographical Implications

• 51 live in urban areas. Seventy-five percent of these live in higher-density cities
• 60 would live within 62 miles of a coastline. Around 50 rely on coastal, marine habitats for essentials
• 82 live in underdeveloped countries having an average income of $5,440/year, equating disposable income of just $15/day. Fifty-one live on less than $2 a day
• 18 in developed nations have an average income of $32,470/year, equaling disposable income of $90/day
• Europe, the US, some Asia Pacific nations account for most of the extremely wealthy. About one-third live in the US. Japan accounts for 27%, the UK for 6%, France 5%
• Half of the population sees only the brightest stars due to light pollution. Imagine the psychological effect, the wonder of starry nights lost to young and old.

So much depends on where we are born and genetics. Appreciate every pain ache, annoyance. We won the Lottery. So share, use our given talents.

The Village contends with ethnic, cultural, religious distrust, with rapid depletion of minerals, resources, forest, wetlands, animal, plant species extinctions, and deteriorating air, soil, water quality. Many aware, many care, but do they have the wealth, influence, desire to act? Can human frailty of distrust, greed, etc., be overcome?

In human society one man’s natural right gives rise to a corresponding duty in other men; the duty, that is, of recognizing and respecting that right. Every basic human right draws its authoritative force from the natural law, which confers it and attaches to it its respective duty.  Hence, to claim one’s rights and ignore one’s duties, or only half fulfill  them, is like building a house with one hand and tearing it down with the  other. (St. John XXIII, Peace on Earth [Pacem in Terris], no.30)

*Please note, aggregated data. Data depends on the date, method of calculation, etc. Categories combined to display our inequities of resource distributions, social inequalities. This is just a general display of our small planet. Some phrasing and terminology have been adjusted. I wonder what comparisons by decades would show?

Sources:

https://usm.maine.edu/international/if-world-were-village-100-0

https://www.nationsonline.org/oneworld/global-village.htm

https://www.mysterra.org/webmag/coup-de-coeur_en.html

This article first appeared in The Catholic Stand

We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience (Pierre Teilhard de Chardin).

Finding the self, soul’s truth is essential for spiritual life. Unfortunately, I belong to the twenty percent of the population who suffer from mental illness, searching for truth is painful, confusing, and marked by missteps. My mind’s thoughts may lie, present false realities of trust, fear, hope.  How can one continuously block out unwanted thoughts, voices, anxiety, mood swings, and darkness? I am one of the more fortunate who suffer. I am a minority. Yet, this is not just my search, but the search of the many other Catholics.

The Journey

We are one, after all, you and I, together we suffer, together exist, and forever will recreate each other (Pierre Teilhard de Chardin).

As perpetual children of God, we must continuously search and question.  Our insecurities, faults, weaknesses, we must admit, accept, carry these burdens and become transparent, for ourselves, for others, toward God’s purer. Human frailties, our crosses, do not hide but, share. Our vulnerabilities bring us closer, unit us. Lighten our load by helping others with their crosses.

Finding the soul, hidden by suffering, how? Quests commence with the baggage of doubt assisted by an open heart, faith, and trust. Begin asking, inquiring Who Am I. Start the search of discovery for the true self – beyond frailties, illnesses of brain and mind. A painful, difficult trial. For this writer, having neither faith nor, trust nor open heart, much was need, still needed from others. The journey toward the interior castle, acceptance of the unexpected awaits. Both pain to joy. I was fortunate.

My path. Undiagnosed until thirty-five years of age, misdiagnosed, given erroneous medications, over-medicated. Twelve years later, 2004, hospitalized – five times in as many months. Finally, the correct identification of a lifetime’s infliction. Therapy revealed more. A slow process of cutting into the mind’s puzzle. Layers of life’s events peeled away toward a true center. Stopping the long downward spiral, slowly, painfully discovering life beyond surviving. Gradually. Growth. Confidence. Finding Truth? Growing to what I was meant to be, as God wanted?

What a liberation to realize that the ‘voice in my head’ is not who I am. ‘Who am I, then?’ The one who sees that (Eckhart Tolle).

With true self visible, obtainable, survivor’s questions of “Why” arose, “Why me? Why Now? Recovery for some diagnoses is never complete. For others, an impermanent painful trial and a return to ‘normalcy’. I recovered more than others, not fully – some traumas never leave. I am lucky – family, friends, a home. Too many are not. Why? Why this journey, this long path, incomplete? And those unable, succumbing, taking the path I nearly traveled? How many more turns are on my path? Are new paths in my future?

Pain’s Purpose?

 In the final analysis, the questions of why bad things happen to good people transmutes itself into some very different questions, no longer asking why something happened, but asking how we will respond, what we intend to do now that it happened ( Pierre Teilhard de Chardin).

Now I give, with joy, with pleasure, helping others along their life path’s struggles. Work and reward of what I thought was impossible just a few years ago.  Now I am what I wanted to be. Now, I pray, for enough time on earth to continue discovering my inner self, making transitions, finding my soul in this world of fog, shadows, and noise. And helping others on this path.

The purpose of suffering, to learn, grow, serve, and to seek You? Have I, have many?  Are we learning to be, enjoying life, assisting others, a new life? May I am not the servant burying his talents. May I preach the gospel without words.

Today, the mind’s eye sees Your beauty of the sun’s glow, of nature’s snow, of rain and clear skies bringing forth inner joys. I see others’ beauty, enhanced, not besmirched, by imperfections. God’s children, made in your image. In You. Deep down our soul must be directed to the simplest pleasure with gratitude for life. How distracting life can be from the beauty offered.

All this splendor, faith, and hope can disappear with the certain triggers of fear as nightmares arise. The mind hyperventilates. The life’s light is drawn closed, bringing forth waves of darkness.  Rationality, love, disappear, losing connections to God.

Lord, is this why you created me, born with certain conditions, experiencing trauma generating additional problems – to serve, become closer to you, to others, to grow? Have I?  Can the future’s path be a little smoother, clearer, transparent, for myself, for the many? Knowing you could have permitted much worse, nevertheless, please prohibit trials of our nightmares never forth come? In failure, do not punish, nor condemn when I disappoint. Let me continue toward

Thee. Will you permit all lives seeking you, not to meander alone, purposeless? Let all see their purpose in Your handiwork.

Finding the Self

How does mental illness, any illness define, affect, shape us? It is part of, but not us. The illness affects thoughts, actions but, it is not us. Emotions, internal conflicts, impediments are part, but these are not us! We are frail of mind and body, made with emotions incorporated into our being.  We are made in God’s image to be drawn to Him.

Intrusive thoughts, darkness, anxiety inhabit, inhibit us. Too many, hobbled by diseases are shunned, cast aside, deemed inferior and incomplete, because of minute misadjusted chemicals in the brain, and body not of our doing. We slip, we fail. Who does not?

Who am I? Not the body, because it is decaying; not the mind, because the brain will decay with the body; not the personality, nor the emotions, for these, also will vanish with death (Ramana Maharshi).

Our true self, our soul, is known to those loving us, accepting us, and always by God. We, like all children of God, are not our possessions, talents, nor deeds. We are what we love, whom we love, how we love, and do what we unto others despite their incompleteness, faults, and failures.

Do we treat all like brothers and sisters?

All humanity is limited by constraints, not of choice. We have no involvement of where, when, health, and social positions we are born into. We are placed, chosen by God.  We have duties and obligations. Given gifts and judged upon the use of these gifts, as in the parable of The Talents. It is the one given the least, who does the least, from fear, the one not accepting the great Love, shown and freely given.

Decisions on Path

My purpose? If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion (The Dalai Lama).

A thousand decisions a day, almost without thought, purpose, meaning. Are we awake, aware of the wider world? How many represent our faith and beliefs? How can we create ways of giving ourselves, being proactive, going beyond daily formalities? Where are our simple acts of kindness?

 Lord, May I have the courage to choose correctly in the smallest of actions to the greatest of challenges.

Who I Am?

Life’s choices, hopefully never as drastic as sung by the tragic hero, Jean Valjean, in the stage presentation of Les Miserables, from the song Who Am I.

When i have come so far,
And struggled for so long.
If I speak, i am condemned,
If i stay silent i am damned.

Knowing our souls belong to God, intensifies our responsibility of fulfilling our purpose.

Hopefully, I’ve found my truth? Is this only journey’s beginning? Consistent work, healing continues besides fighting the mind’s demons. Therapy, family, friends saved in my life. Now repayment, the beauty of obligation. What has been learned, gifted must be shared. Are we using our talents to the fullest? Is being me, enough? How much deeper lay my true self?  Am I, are we, Preaching the Gospel by deeds.

You and your purpose in life are the same thing. Your purpose is to be you (George Alexiou).

Beyond the Path

We live in this greatest mystery – life, in this unfolding story of our lives preparing for the unknown tomorrows. Lives of impermanence moving forward, toward eternity.  We are part of the world visible, where our actions can multiply the world’s beauty, like the butterfly, a flower, a simple tree’s magnificence, if we know how to see. Is it possible seeing, without knowing oneself, beyond the wounds, intrusiveness, of mind’s malfunctioning neurons? Beyond invasive demands of everyday life? I unearthed through faith, discipline, searching for the inner.

May I, we all be what the Prayer of St. Francis intends,

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace…

Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
Where there is injury, pardon;
Where there is doubt, faith;
Where there is despair, hope;
Where there is darkness, light;
Where there is sadness, joy;

O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;
To be understood as to understand;
To be loved as to love.

For it is in giving that we receive;
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
And it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.

This is what I hope to be because “I am the drop that contains the ocean” (Yunus Emre).

This article first appeared in The Catholic Stand

Articles published in My Daily Visitor

Monday Weekday October 21

Romans 4:20-25/Luke 12:13-21

Greed Possesses

I have a bumper sticker,” There is enough for Human need, but not enough for Human greed”. Seen another, “Greed Kills”. There’s this oldie, “The one who dies with the most toys wins”.  It’s sad seeing others falling to another of the score of human weaknesses. My anger arises over the waste created by greed/lust for possessions, denying others in need. A favorite movie, “The Treasure of the Sierra Madre” shows the slow disintegration of a group of men mining for gold. Man losses much of his humanity when they are unable to look beyond the self as the object of their desire possesses them.

“Take care to guard against all greed,” say Jesus and it’s not just the physical/ material. Greed can consist be the overwhelming desire for control, power and sex.

When the material desires overwhelm the spiritual, may my soul find strength and purpose.

October 22 Tuesday Weekday

Romans 5:12, 15b, 17-19, 20b-21/Luke 12:35-38

A Father’s Faithfulness

Every weekday dad had the same schedule, up at 5 am, home at 5pm, maybe a side job at 7pm. Consistency, honesty, faithfully through decades of work he established a framework that I can hopefully pass down to my family, my son. A foundation received from his father.

Vigilant, faithfulness, loyalty, trust, those who practice will receive much grace, Jesus emphasizes today in Luke.

A nun was administrating in a male prison. When Mother’s Day came around she never had enough cards for the inmates. Thinking ahead she purchased multiple cards for Father’s Day. There was not a single request. Not one inmate desired a card of gratitude for their father. There was an absence of a father’s life in these inmates. There was an absence of male guidance; there was no foundation.

Lord, help me to be faithful in all aspects of life: work, friendships and family.

Wednesday Weekday October 23

[Saint John of Capistrano, Priest]

Romans 6:12-18/Luke 12:39-48

Choose Your Master

We’re all ‘slaves’. Before the first Christmas, we were slaves to our biological, emotional, psychological and physiological needs and desires. Through the institution of the Eucharist, the Crucifixion and Easter Sunday, Paul says our Lord has given us another choice, a new master.

With the gift of ‘free will’ I can take that choice of that very difficult road away from needs dominated by this physical plane.

In the course of my therapy and ongoing recovery, I experienced and witnessed many battles of the spiritual plane trying to free the soul from various encumbrances caused by birth – original sin. It’ll never be an easy struggle as our earthly self desires those things that hold us back. I know that my various ascensions will be hindered as I go through life’s phases.

Ease the obstacles, Lord, as I try to overcome our world to ascend to Yours.

October 24 Thursday Weekday

[Saint Anthony Mary Claret, Bishop]

Romans 6:19-23/Luke 12:49-53

Shaken, Tested, Rebirth

I like to garden; its enjoyable most of the time. However, taking a plant and transferring it to new soil creates some apprehension. I’m afraid of damaging the root system, but sometimes it has to be done. Long ago, I read that when repotting some plants, it’s good to shake up and shake out the roots – remove some of the old soil clinging and give the roots a chance with new soil, unhindered.

St. Paul cites Jesus, saying He intended to create division amongst us (and within ourselves, I may add), to shake things up. No relationship will be safe from challenges He presents.  Jesus will weed out the garden, making us feeling uncomfortable, forcing us to think differently, outside the box with the trials only He could offer.

Lord, make me strong in the face of not just Your challenges but all challenges.

Friday Weekday October 25

Romans 7:18-25a/Luke 12:54-59

Seeing the Signs?

A key to success in most relationships is being able to read those nonverbal messages that reflect emotions, thoughts and beliefs in changing, fluid relationships.

Luke tell us today of Jesus’ condemnation of the crowds’ unwillingness to see His works, His purpose because of their arrogance and stubbornness. If I focus too much on the self, on unimportant details, the bigger picture is often missed or misinterpreted leading to unintended, negative consequences.

I worked for a small accounting firm that eventually merged. Due to my inexperience and misapplied focus, I could not see, until it was too late, that the once familiar comfortable office culture was changing into something more aggressive and unpleasant. I was too focused on the day to day business; not observing the small world of my employment.

False signs and signs of truth abound, help me to distinguish Your words and work, Lord.

October 26 Saturday Weekday

Romans 8:1-11/Luke13:1-9

Spirit Triumphing Flesh.

“We are not human beings having a spiritual experience; we are spiritual beings having a human experience.” Pierre Teilhard de Chardin, S.J.  Again, St. Paul tells us to rise above the demands and desires of the flesh. To break away from what holds us as animals, what is temporary, Our Lord, from spirit to flesh to His sacrifice to fully human and divine, fashioned a path of true freedom, where we can shed desires of the flesh for the divine.

My enjoyments, my hobbies, my fears and worries all may keep me from achieving the higher plane for which we are created. They distract from the ultimate goal – being with Him. Time, age, wisdom, decrease the desires of the flesh, but the needs of the flesh increase with age, distracting us from the divine.

Help me keep, Lord, on the path toward the divine away from the physical self.

Sunday Thirtieth Sunday in Ordinary Time October 27

Sirach 35:12-14, 16-18/2 Timothy 4:6-8, 16-18/Luke 18:9-14

Know Your History

Today’s first reading is from the Book of Sirach. It is not included in the Hebrew Bible nor recognized by Protestant faiths, but why and is that important?  Sirach, according to The Catholic Study Bible is “a collection of proverbs organized in such a way as to resemble short essays.” I remember some English literature classes being taught on how important the background of the story was as important as the story itself. The author’s personal history and the times/conditions under which the book was written, can reflect and enhance the book’s message and purpose.

There is much I would like to learn in our early history, especially from our Jewish heritage and its foundation along with the various influences of Greek thought. Some knowledge may really enhance my understanding of our faith.

God, lead me to a greater knowledge and understanding of all sects who follow You.

October 28 Monday Saints Simon and Jude, Apostles  Feast

Ephesians 2:19-22/Luke 6:12-16

Human Fallibilities, Helpful?

Today, as we celebrate the Feast Day for Saints Simon and Jude, I will try to imagine, wonder how the disciples of Jesus were able to put aside their strong cultural differences and beliefs. How were they able to put aside their various egos, prejudices, competitiveness, jealousies and all those other “wonderful” character traits that make us human? Did the Divineness of our Lord somehow make these qualities insignificant?  Or maybe their fallible humanity made them better disciples and apostles.  As the twelve were selected, were the remaining disciples jealous? Did any give up and return home?

What would I do? Would I have been able to see the Divine and put aside my self-importance, my ego? Would I serve? Hopefully my heart would be aware and open, accepting what I could not understand and comprehend.

Help me, to be a good disciple, putting aside qualities the separate me from You.

Tuesday Weekday October 29

Romans 8:18-25/Luke 13:18-21

Radical Acceptance

Growing pains occur at all stages of life. Paul writes today that we are always growing within this world and within ourselves, this world is incomplete and pain/suffering will accompany us. Suffering is a result of not accepting pain. The acceptance of pain reduces the suffering is a belief in therapy called “radical acceptance”. Surrendering, accepting the uncomfortable situation(s) reduces the mental and physical anguish.  Much distress is caused unwillingness, stubbornness and futile attempts for relief. By dwelling on certain future events that may or may not occur is not only a waste of time and energy, but negatively enhances and physical and mental discomforts.

By accepting the anguish of future dental work, my sense of well-being remained strong. Of course, there will be pain, but acceptance brings relief and a faster recovery.

Help me, Lord, to accept the growing pains of my life with hope and endurance.

October 30 Wednesday Weekday

Romans 8:26-30/Luke 13:22-30

Doing Enough?

The narrow gate, the first shall be last – powerful, frightening. I am doing enough? Am I being enough of a Christian? Or is it my scrupulosity taking control? Do I have the strength for this great effort needed to enter Heaven?

“Sometimes I would like to ask God why He allows poverty, suffering, injustice, when He could do something about it. But I will not because I’m afraid He’ll ask me’, is an abridgement of a familiar quote. So I do what I can, where I can, hoping that’s enough and trust that God will place me in situations not too far out of my comfort zone. I hope I will not underestimate or overestimate my abilities/capabilities or as St. Francis’ prayer goes, to know the difference between what I can and cannot change/accomplish.

May Your hand Lord always guide me as I try to do Your work.

Thursday Weekday October 31

Romans 8:31b-39/Luke 13:31-35

God above All

“If God if for us, who can be against us?” Paul writes, and I would have answered, “Rome, the World”.  The anguish the early followers must have felt; their loneliness as outsiders in a pagan empire that controlled most of the known world. Chronic illness can separate one from the ‘real’ world. While outside appearances and constant social/commercial images make it seem that no one else has worries, no one else is struggling, deep down I know how false this world and its trappings really are.

Of course, Paul through Christ has answers for those countless generations wanting to “see” beyond the physical constraints of their specific cultures – through His love, with the Trinity, God will aid me in my continuous internal and external struggles as He has done in the past.

Lord, help me to constantly repeat the mantras of Your love, Your salvation, Your strength.

Articles published in My Daily Visitor

Friday October 11, 2013

Mass Readings: Joel 1:13-15; 2:1-2/Luke 11:15-26

Darkness, Struggles and Hope?

There will always be battles, small and large. Life’s a roller-coaster; it’s one struggle and then another. One day its financial another day health – struggles from living on this physical plane. Then there are battles against evil, both the physical and spiritual, dwelling amongst us.

Both our readings today start darkly, but conclude, with our Lord triumphant, almost, as the Gospel ends with one demon joining with seven others. They are always searching, never resting, taking enjoyment out of bringing suffering to us, the children of God. (Maybe they’re jealous).

Unlike the witnesses of demon cast out, we know He has the power. We know Who wins in the end, but the struggles continue; the negative thoughts still come. Every day is a battle; everyday is an opportunity to help someone.

Lord, help me see beyond the struggles. Let me see enough to see Truth.

October 12, 2013 Saturday

Mass Readings: Joel 4:12-21/Luke11:27-28

Beyond Bloodlines.

Today’s readings raise our spirits. Joel gives joy and Jesus tells us our physical heritage doesn’t matter for those who are obedient to God’s word. Bloodlines denoted so much more than what we can imagine from our ‘modern’ perspective.

Today, heritage still matters. Heritage can dictate our paths in life. Financially, socially, emotionally, medically, there are impacts, pluses and minuses. To some extent, my illnesses are inherited. There’s no one to blame; it’s no use saying ‘what if”. It’s just taking one step at a time, if that much. And guess what – Our Lord takes all this into account. He knows us better than we do. So I should read Joel over and over until it sinks in that we can win, we’ll be with Him.

Help me see, Lord, that my path chosen by You, leads to You.

Sunday October 13, 2013

Mass Readings: 2 Kings 5:14-17/2 Timothy 2:8-13/Luke 17:11-19

Consistently Ungrateful?

Through work, I received a little chart called, “The Village of 100”. It cleverly denotes the world population down to 100 individuals.  Some of the data given is understandable, such as 61 villagers would be Asian, 14 African and 5 from North America. There are the eye opening notes: only 33 have cellular phones, there will be only 18 cars, and 70 will be working and 28 of them would work in agriculture. Then there are the disturbing notes:  30 would be unemployed or underemployed, 53 would live on less than $2 U.S. a day, 18 would be unable to read or write and 63 of our neighbors would have inadequate sanitation. One (too many) is starving. I am, at times, one of the nine ungrateful lepers. Everyday should be a day of thanks.

May I always be thankful and grateful and never forget my global family.

October 14, 2013 Monday

Mass Readings: Romans 1:1-7/Luke 11:29-32

Time to Learn

Today’s reading, St. Paul’s letter and the life of, St. Callistus are both full of struggles, pain and sacrifices, for the Church, for the future, for me and buttress my belief that I too must carry my weight, learn and become absorbed by our Church’s great offerings.

There is such glorious riches in our Church; riches of the spiritual, theological and historical. And what do I do? I look at the cultural works of our society and instead of bringing myself closer to the infinite I look at the finite.  I need to remind myself to take that leap of faith, spend time with the saints, the writers and the builders of our Faith.  A good secular story is fine, but it’s time to leave this cultural grid and see so much that is offered.

Lord, lead me to what improves my soul, not what improves the temporary.

Tuesday Memorial Saint Teresa of Jesus, Virgin and Doctor of the Church October 15, 2013

Mass Readings: Romans 1:16-25/Luke 11:37-41

Displays of Courage

The most difficult strength to possess is probably not physical strength, but moral and spiritual strength, especially in the face cultural decay sown by wealth and arrogance. Dietrich Bonhoeffer and St Maximilian Kolbe are two individuals that come to mind, but many are unknown to the books of history. There are gravestones from Iwo Jima to Normandy to the nameless who pray outside abortion clinics, each generation has their trials and we know our Savior stands besides us.

We are called in some way to deliver the message of God. Saint Theresa of Jesus defied those of her own faith who could not accept her. Saint Paul’s first eight words in today’s letter displays courage beyond my gasp. Too many times I may have backed away. I hope the future will be different.

From the most demeaning task to the most profound, may I have courage of faith.

October 16, 2013 Wednesday

[Saint Hedwig, Religious; Saint Margaret Mary Alacoque, Virgin]

Mass Readings:  Romans 2:1-11/Luke 11:42-46

Illness, Stigma, Judgment.

Teased, bullied and mocked, as one who suffers from mental illness, I’ve experienced immature and childish judgment. As an adult, I’ve seen and experienced judgments of ‘first impressions’, comparisons and ignorance. I fight it where I can. Others campaign as well. The Associated Press understands the stigma and announced it will improve, clarify methodology on reporting the news and its relationship to mental illness.

Judgment, mentioned in both readings, should alone come from God or from an authority that recognizes themselves as subjected to God seeing themselves as fallible, not flawless.  But, we judge constantly: on ones clothing, weight, hair, color of their skin. It seems a natural reflex, but is it a human trait or a cultural one?   Either way, we have a long road of hard work to become what we could be.

Please help me right the wrongs of those and myself when we judge others.

Thursday Memorial Saint Ignatius of Antioch, Bishop and Martyr October 17, 2013

Mass Readings: Romans 3:21-30/Luke 11:47-54

Our Unknown Paths.

From soldier, to priest, to Saint, from persecutor, to believer, promoter, advocate to Saint. As we celebrate this Feast day of Saint Ignatius and the Letter of Saint Paul, life as exemplified by them, , can have many diverse paths, encounters, ‘coincidences’. Where I should be, is an unanswered question, until arriving confidently at the ‘here’ where God wants me. Saints and many faith-filled individuals underwent drastic transformations, which must have been quite psychologically painful, maybe physically and soul wrenching as well.

From accountant to masters degree, mental illness (inherit) to freelance writer, a healthier, enhanced, faith filled Catholic, my life has taken drastic, painful changes. The inner self has grown, is growing, improving maybe becoming a better person, a better Christian. However, I wish it was less painful, with a lot less agitation.

May I know my path, its markings, signposts and detours that are fashioned by You.

October 18, 2013 Feast Day Friday Saint Luke Evangelist

Mass Readings: 2 Timothy 4:10-17b/Luke 10:1-9

Alone, Uncertain, Afraid

Hospitalizations can be a most trying, challenging moment in a patient and their family’s life.  Abandoned, overwhelmed, away from the familiar, confronting an uncertain fate while questioning faith can test the capacity of human endurance. Paul, in his letter to Timothy, may have felt similar abandonment, distress and agitation.

My psychiatric hospitalization was years ago in 2005, (five times in as many months), the mental, soul-searching pain was acute. With mental illness, one is fighting both a biological disorder and a psychological one. With mental illness, diagnosis is not obtained through blood analysis, x-rays and scans, but through very subjective behavior analysis. Meanwhile, medication can be guess work trying to find the chemical and psychological drug combination needed. With mental illness, hospitalization is only the beginning of a long, strenuous, treatment toward well-being.

Let us remember and help all those alone, uncertain, in all our medical facilities.

Saturday Memorial Saints John de Brebeuf and Isaac Jogues, Priests October 19, 2013

Mass Readings: Romans 4:13, 16-18/Luke 12:8-12

Absolutely No Forgiveness

Luke’s passage frightens me: to be without hope – forever – for having sinned against the Holy Spirit. I had to search the web for a listing of the aforementioned sins and then search my soul. It’s like looking up physical symptoms on the internet and seeing what disease one may have. (I rarely do this creates – too much anxiety.)  With my obsessive thoughts and human emotions, I need to be careful and discuss with my pastor for more clarity. I believe, however, that what our Lord intends is something beyond normal human actions and reactions. It’s worth a brief conversation, for the sake of knowledge, peace and scrupulosity.

If you want to be frightened some more, read about the lives of the saints honored today; the ordeals suffered for we take for granted.

Guide my Lord, away from what actions and thoughts that harm one’s soul.

October 20, 2013 Sunday

Mass Readings: Exodus 17:8-13/2 Timothy 3:14-4:2/Luke 18:1-8

Proclaim and Persist

Recently we established a parish library of about one hundred books and videos. Books can unlock the mind to opportunities of spiritual growth, opening wide the gifts of Faith, that some manuscripts had done for me. Having that one text connecting with the right person is priceless. The hospital where I work and receive therapy, we established a small library for patients and employees, containing various selections including spiritual texts. One book can provide moments of peace away from the difficult circumstances life offers.

In our own way we follow Paul’s command to Timothy to – “proclaim the word”.  In today’s parable, persistence is encouraged. It was difficult collecting the volumes, finding bookshelves, etc., but we kept going, hoping with prayers that our ideas and work would have meaning and value.

While proclaiming you Lord, give us strength to persevere in fruitful and fulfilling work.

Articles published in My Daily Visitor

Tuesday Memorial of Saint Therese of the Child Jesus, Virgin and Doctor of the Church October 1

Mass Readings: Zechariah 8:20-23/Luke 9:51-56

Rejected But Hope

Was there hope for the Samaritans after rejecting our Lord in today’s Gospel? This people were spared, but why? Was Jesus trying to teach the apostles other ways besides using (abusing) power freely given because there was hope, hope for their children and their children’s children, and because force is not always the answer?

We’re on paths not always freely chosen.  Would I be different if I walked in the Samaritans’ shoes? I should accept, forgive those who deny me and be gracious to those who welcome me. At times I certainly didn’t welcome others, being too busy, too focused on the self. I should take time out to ponder how open my heart is to those with different thoughts and beliefs. With chronic illness, my views may be cloudy.

Lord, help me see through the eyes of others, so when denied I may understand.

October 2 Wednesday Memorial of the Holy Guardian Angels       

Mass Readings: Nehemiah 2:1-8/Matthew 18:1-5,10

Angels Among Us

I like the concept of angelic beings and love the actuality of these pure spirits, especially having guardians to freely aiding and supporting us. Today as we honor our Guardian Angels with this memorial, I think of St. Padre Pio, his life and work with Guardian Angels and the marvelous true stories.

Reading about the angels is so refreshing. Reading on how they fit into our Christian Spirituality and how they work in our lives gives me so much hope in a world that can be so difficult with many struggles, both mental and physical. Like many other things of my Catholic Faith and my life in general, my guardian angels I take for granted. Remember also that our angels need our prayers, its food for the spiritual.

Guardian angel, help me discern your voice, to listen, keeping me from doing anything stupid.

Thursday October 3

Mass Readings: Nehemiah 8:1-4a,5-6,7b-12/Luke 10:1-12

With Empty Pockets

Today we read about a marvelous assignment given to the disciples, to go out into the world, helping others directly. Was this a test of trust for these first missionaries, nevertheless what an honor it must have been.

With every task there is responsibility, struggles, temptations and anxiety and to leave without the barest of essentials forced the followers to fully rely on God.  Am I ready to fully rely on God?  The best I can say is – I try, I pray. I don’t know how others would handle this assignment, journeying without the simplest of material supports, but my anxiety would surely be heightened. I need my “security blankets” whenever I travel, even for a daytrip. So I take along books, water, maybe a snack. Is it time to lighten my load?

May my anxiety, Oh Lord, be a means and not a hindrance in serving You.

October 4 Friday Saint Francis of Assisi

Mass Readings: Baruch 1:15-22/Luke 10:13-16

Simplicity, Poverty, Saintly

Our recently elected Jesuit Pope has taken his new name from St. Francis of Assisi, one of the poor, for the poor. Both Saint and Pope are known for simple lives, for putting aside the tapestry that the world would have gladly given them if they had so desired, but instead became one with the least the world – the poor and the weak. Putting aside luxuries shows trust and confidence in the Faith of our Lord.

I look at my life and see the ornaments that constitute my tapestry. My own human weaknesses of insecurity, doubt, hesitation and skepticism keep me from truly letting go. Do I really need my extras in life, especially when they could be used by others like my books, containing knowledge that could be shared?

Lord, help me to shed the trappings and extras of life, easing my burdens.

Saturday October 5

Mass Readings: Baruch 4:5-12,27-29/Luke 10:17-24

The Battle Joined

The seventy-two disciples who have ventured out, truly relying on God, have now joyfully returned in today’s Gospel and rejoice. Slowly, evil is being fought and the battles of Faith, for Faith, are being won. Satan’s reign over the world is coming to an end and the old order is opening to the new.

Am I, how am I, fighting battles against evil? The battles of ignorance, solitude, loneliness, prejudice faced by those who suffer from chronic illness i.e. mental illness. What about the multitude of injustices for those who cannot stand up for themselves, the unborn, the old, the sick, the shuttered? The battles, small or large, should never be ignored. I am not expected to preach on street corners but I am expected to aid those in need.

Help me Lord, to have the courage to stand for the convictions my faith demands.

October 6 Sunday

Mass Readings: Hebrews 1:2-3; 2:2-4/2 Timothy 1:6-8,13-14/Luke 17:5-10

It’s Our Obligation

Within a period of two weeks, I found an endorsed check and an insurance card. I expected accolades for saving the owners not just money, but time, aggravation and headaches. Today’s Gospel reading shows that such attention is unworthy. Jesus implores the disciples not to expect glory, commendations, for doing what is expected, what is an obligation. For Christians, good deeds do not require a thank you, a pat on the back.

Most of us would like to receive praise for routine jobs and chores, but does undeserved/false praise lead to maturity? False praise can create pride, self-confidence; however, that may lead to sins of pride and self-centeredness, ignoring the One, who gives grace and talents. My writing skills are a gift, seeking praise omits the Creator. Oh, but that praise feels so good!

May my Faith, Lord, be the only praise needed. Following you is the only path.

Monday Our Lady of the Rosary October 7

Mass Readings: Jonah 1:1-2:2,11/Luke 10:25-37

The Power Prayer

Simple, repetitive, powerful – words describing one of the most important tools in our arsenal of Faith. We’re honoring the Rosary today, celebrated initially for the victory of Christians over the Turks at Lepanto in 1573.   I must remember all its glorious history, its power and importance to keeping and strengthening my faith.

I always have trouble setting aside time. Be it ten minutes or twenty, restlessness keeps body and mind too involved and focused with other issues, preventing me, at times from concentrating on the Mysteries and the true meaning of their words. While my favorite mystery is the Luminous Mysteries with the decade focusing on the Transfiguration as my favorite, the Sorrowful Mysteries with the Agony in the Garden, its overwhelming anxiety and fear that predominate make meditating difficult.

Help me focus, feel and welcome the power of the Rosary, Lord.

October 8 Tuesday

Mass Readings: Jonah 3:1-10/Luke 10:38-42

Seize the Moment

Choosing between an obligation and an opportunity to learn as a disciple of our Lord seems like a no-brainer. Today, Jesus admonishes Martha for her poor choice. One can become a captive to duty and routine. Like Harry Chapin’s song, Cat’s in the Cradle, one can miss out so much, quickly. My son is twenty-one and like most parents, I wonder what happened, where did the time go? How did he grow so fast, so mature, so responsible? I was there, yet I wasn’t there mentally as my thoughts were usually someplace else, physically, also, as there was work and chores to be done. “Doing the dishes”, while the world moves onward without you is a terrible place to be. May I learn from past errors, move forward and be in the moment.

How often, Lord, I have missed opportunities. Help me focus on what matters.

Wednesday October 9

Mass Readings: Jonah 4:1-11/Luke 11:1-4

God’s Mercy: Forgiveness

When someone renounces their ways, seeking forgiveness, it’s human nature that continues to seek punishment to equal the crime. Jonah certainly felt that way toward the inhabitants of Nineveh as told in the first reading. Fortunately, this is not God’s way, for most of us would certainly have been punished for more sins than we can remember. God sees us as His children. When our child seeks forgiveness and relents, do we punish, especially when their behavior has changed in a positive way? When we seek forgiveness, do we not hope for reprieve especially when the self improves?

It is very difficult to forgive those who harmed me or those I love. The pain can still be felt years after the occurrence. Maybe forgiveness will ease the trauma.

God, help me accept your grace and give grace to those who harmed me.

October 10, Thursday

Mass Readings: Malachi 3:13-20b/Luke 11:5-13

Persistence, Timing, Patience

We are children of God, never far removed from Him, no matter the vastness of time and space. Generations may pass, but distance never weakens His connection, for God has no grandchildren only children.

As mentioned in today’s Gospel, our Father wants us to pester Him through persistence.  How many parents can say that with their children? I can’t. We’re never to stop asking through our prayers for our needs and desires. Of course they have to be reasonable, but the caveat is that you never know how or when He will answer.  Only He knows if they are truly for our benefit and when it is best to receive. Timing can be everything. As I look back at important relationships, clearly there can be such a thing as the right time and right place.

Help me Lord to remember, that You know what’s best and when.

Articles published in My Daily Visitor

February 21, 2010 Sunday

It can be Wonderful

Today, Paul writes that God holds no distinction between peoples and cultures.  He shows no favoritism. Christianity may accept that today, but that has not always been the case. Human history, Christian, as well, has been filled with wars of hatred, acts of bigotry. It still continues after 2,000 years of His word. What can one person do? It starts with one person, a kind word, a small donation, teaching proper values, etc. Don’t let the hatred spread. Sow words and actions of peace.

It’s easy to feel outside cultural and social bounds. From illness to prejudice, self-esteem is easily damaged. We seek venues to ease the pain – alcohol & drugs, holding in anger and hurting ones we love and who love us. We fail and fall but not in God’s eye. We belong!

Lord, help me to follow your teachings with words and actions.

February 22, 2010 Monday The Chair of St. Peter, Apostle

Peter, fallible, emotional, unpredictable, who could have imagined a cornerstone, a rock such as this? How can someone with faults as these accomplish so much? The strengths of his character, the sheer personality of this man must have been formidable indeed. When we need to build something, we start with an item that is near perfection; for a foundation, Jesus selected Peter, one whose weakness may have only strengthened the task ahead. He saw the power of the man.

Throughout these meditations, I have written about my weaknesses, but I have not discussed the strengths of surviving with illness. As discomforting as I am, there is progress. Working two part-time jobs, living in a circle of caring family and friends there are moments of clarity, a stronger belief system, greater disciple, more love.

Let me see the strength of others, not their faults, Lord

February 23, 2010 Tuesday St. Polycarp

Abba

It’s not our God, nor our Ruler, nor our Creator, but our Father, from one who is All. He is lowering himself, becoming, the father of imperfection to an emotional, unstable race of beings who will destroy His only Son. That is forgiveness, before the act leading to the sin requiring forgiveness. As children there were times when we did not deserve to be loved. As parents, there were times we are not proud of our offspring.

For me, the difficult part of the Our Father are the words “Thy will be done”. It is so difficult to back up these words with action, giving control to the Lord. To accept the falls our Lord wants us to take – Let Go, Let God, losing the façade of controlling your destiny, living with uncertainty.

Keep on teaching me, Lord, to pray and grow in prayer and all its forms.

February 24, 2010 Wednesday

Nosey Intruders?

An outsider in a foreign land pointing out their evils, will certainly not be welcomed, but our Jonah is accepted. Surprisingly, his prophetic words are heeded.  How often in our lives did an outsider point to the obvious? How often does truth come from the mouth of babes? And what kind of reception do we give them? Being a New Yorker, from Brooklyn no less, I was very cynical and suspect of good intentions – a crustiness that has mostly disappeared.

Therapy can be very difficult at times. Advice from friends and family can be stinging. Pride and ego want no part of this correction. I want to believe that I know all, but of course I don’t. An outsiders’ perspective, can literally be a life-saving one. There’s much to learn and enjoy.

Give me a little nudge, Lord, to listen and heed when others offer advice.

February 25, 2010 Thursday

Talking to God

There are many ways to pray.  For me the rosary is the most powerful and the hardest, trying to keep focused and putting aside time is difficult. Prayer is a very personal action; we keep it to ourselves in this masculine culture for it can be seen as a sign of weakness.  I am sure this is not the way Jesus intended. It takes strength to pray, to admit weakness, doubt, insecurity. Real men pray.

Jesus says today that our prayers are answered through God’s love for us. Is it possible our human eyes do not see and our minds cannot comprehend answers when we believe that none were given? Is it possible that answers are beyond our time and space?

Pray whenever an ambulance, police, fire truck pass by. Pray while waiting on line.

Lord, when I forget to pray tell me, when I forget how show me.

February 26, 2010 Friday

Reconciliation and Forgetting

A God that forgets our past sins, that’s what Ezekiel, “father of Judaism”, says in today’s reading. Sounds like something married couples and families do, or should. In this case one can say that our race has better memories than God. Look at how many hold grudges, people as well as nations. So much of our precious time and energy is lost when we continue to hold onto this pain. Let go, let God take charge.

We live in world of imperfection, but somehow we always expect perfection and nothing less. Under certain conditions, that is understandable.  What standards are we to apply to our brothers? How long shall we continue on a path of unforgivenness? For years I was misdiagnosed. I recognized the reasons; accepted them, as enough time appears to have passed.

Lord, give me the courage to forget, forgive, let go and let You rule.

February 27, 2010 Saturday

Pro Active Faith

Can we sit back and let life just roll by? No way, according to today’s reading, for Jesus is pushing us to get closer to our true potential – Him. He wants a growing relationship not an idling one. What do we do? How many generations must pass until we truly learn? How patience is He? This is not a religion of rituals; it is one that challenges our fears, our anxieties, and our soul.

A priest once said to me that Jesus will draw us closer to Him and then step away encouraging us to take the next step. Like a toddler learning to walk, a parent will keep enticing another step – keeping distant but close enough to prevent unnecessary falls and pain. Difficult and hard to accept, but what’s the other choice?

I will try, Lord, to do my best, I will need you to lean on.

February 28, 2009 Sunday

What a Gift

We started the month with demons and the drowning of swine. We end it with the beautiful gift of the Transfiguration – a present given without being asked but certainly needed. While we view the transfiguration with knowledge of Easter; imagine what the apostles felt.

This is one of my favorite events. The dark blue night, the stars shining magnificently, the dazzling white of our Lord’s appearance, Moses and Elijah, Heaven and Earth, God, The Trinity, for one brief moment connect. All that was missing was music.

We all face moments of crises and could use an experience like the above. Being aware, one may see the gifts offered. In group, I learned about writing every night five things we can be grateful for. After a period of time ones outlook will change.

I know You are present always Holy Spirit, please help me recognize Your Grace.

 

Articles published in My Daily Visitor

February 11, 2010 Thursday (Our Lady of Lourdes)

Wonderful Visits

Lourdes, Damascus, Akita, Mexico City, Fatima, Knock, Bannuex, Medjugorje, Beauraing, etc. How wonderful! Our Lady has appeared throughout the world in different times to different cultures. She has foretold wars and calamities. She has prevented wars, calamities, healed individuals and entire peoples spiritually and physically. And Our Mother has sternly warned us, time and again to correct our ways.  We hear but do not listen.

My favorite – Our Lady of Guadalupe. Mary spoke in the native dialect and her complexion resembled the native complexion. Most of all, she left her wonderful image on Juan Diego’s tilma, for all to see, to this day. This picture, of many meanings, for a culture that used images in lieu of an alphabet. The more we learn, the greater the wonder of Our Lady of Tepeyac Hill.

Lord, may those who desire pilgrimages to The Holy sites have their dreams fulfilled.

February 12, 2010 Friday

Mysterious Actions

Why does Our Lord tell the healed to remain silent? The healings will not long remain secret in the close knit communities of that time. His actions will speak for Him. By this, the faults of the braggarts, i.e., the Pharisees, will only become more visible. Our actions must speak for themselves. Words may come too easily to our lips.  Action gains respect. Respect is essential for life and family unity.

Why does Jesus go through the physical acts of healing? Why does He use His saliva and hands to heal, when just a thought or a simple touch would have sufficed? Why does He walk away from the crowd to heal the mute? Let the theologians discuss. I’ll take the cure and one more individual believing and free from suffering.

Holy Spirit, be present in times of struggle and may I be silent and welcoming.

February 13, 2010 Saturday

Trust in the Moment

Something is happening in your village. Neighboring towns are a buzz with stories of a Rabbi not only saying, but doing things that must be an exaggeration. You’re a peasant, a conquered one – in other words a slave being ruled by force. You live day to day, from week to week, solely dependent on nature and the whims of distant kings.  You have grasped on to hope before, will this man and His words be any different? You drop chores. Put aside responsibilities and venture with family and friends in search of hope. You are not thinking past the next sunrise. You are thinking of Faith and your fate. You will deal with the heat, absence of food, for something you haven’t felt since childhood- peace.

Can we venture the same today?

When needed Lord, I pray that nothing interferes with the mission at hand.

February 14, 2010 Sunday

Paradoxical Promises sustaining Hope

Writing on a muggy Sunday in July, this is the most difficult topic to date, – the Beatitudes. Not knowing where to begin, until I opened my not used enough, Catechism of the Catholic Church. Considering myself a good Catholic, there is so much to know, even with the help of my pastor, my spiritual director, EWTN, etc. This is a life long learning process and possibly after-life one as well.

The Beatitudes paradoxically show that earthly wealth is not true wealth and true happiness can never be obtained here. True fulfillment is not here but with God where our soul desires. I feel, they are paths to follow and are not for those whose goal is to be on the Fortune 500 listings. I need to remember this and seek His guidance constantly.

Lord, You gave these promises, help me to choose accordingly the proper paths.

February 15, 2010 Monday

Thickheaded and Preconceived Notions

I wonder what kind of sign the Pharisees were looking for. They have heard and seen so much, however, like the rest of us, they have preconceived ideas about the way things ought to be. As a child, I had this habit of trying to visualize what our vacation spot might look like when we went on our family trips. Usually imagining incorrectly, I grew out of these childish games and accepted the situation as it was.

The Pharisees could not accept anything that deviated from their training and cultural bonds. No matter what signs Jesus performed, unless they were within the narrow scope of their preconceived notions, Our Lord would never be joyfully welcomed.  We must not allow our minds to limit ourselves to a set of preconceived solutions and ideas.

Lord, help me see how humanism can be detrimental to Your loving truth.

February 16, 2010 Tuesday

Being Refined and Strengthen

Today, I am told that all our earthly desires, temptations, tests are from the Evil one. We must always be on guard and pray for ourselves and others. Temptations, especially, the small ones, abound in our culture. It’s so easy to keep quiet when we’re given too much change or undercharged.

God is the source of all that is good but why does He permit evil to occur? The question will never be answered in this now. We are like a child learning to ride a bicycle, who will fall, then learn how to fall and eventually learn to ride. He can see when evil interferes with our paths; however, we usually do not see God injecting Himself on a more subtle level. We do not see Jesus removing those boulders that block the road.

May I grow and see the positives when calamities strike. Rise above when temptation enters.

February 17, 2010 Wednesday Ash Wednesday

Time to Review

When I was younger, ashes represented the simplistic views of childhood. Now it is time to seek deeper meanings, of my human failings. It is time for inner contemplation of those special relationships and their reflection upon my spiritually.  Lent can be the time to review our understanding of what it means to be Catholic and how it should interact with those relationships. I am fortunate to have my circle of family and friends.

We are admonished in today’s reading not to be braggarts and hypocrites, however we live in a society that measures and compares an individuals’ level of success. For example, television is loaded with junk reality shows that force strangers to top each other in degrading activities. Our deep spirituality should reflect what we do in all our activities.

May this Season of Lent bring me closer to You and others, Lord.

February 18, 2009 Thursday

Crosses

Today, Jesus discourses on the burdens of individual crosses. In group therapy, we ponder our suffering and ask, “Why Lord, why me, why now?’ Somewhere I read this reply, “Why not you, why not now?” Is this for some greater good not comprehensible? We help each other and struggle every day. We can become angry with God, but that is okay, He understands our pain. He was one of us.

With our crosses we may seek Him more readily and are drawn closer. Without, we may more easily succumb to this material world. I must take upon myself that the cross I bear, the things I cannot do are God’s directions to a life not yet pictured. He is pointing me down a specific path, but sometimes I wish He would show me the map.

Help me alleviate the suffering of others; this is a journey, not an end.

February 19, 200 Friday

A Continuing Facade

Today we read in Isaiah, man’s false commitment to God and tomorrow, the poem continues about the joy and treasures that awaits, if we only follow. In the New Testament, I remember Jesus telling the Pharisees the same thing. Looking around, I see today, that a lot has not changed. Why do we not follow?  Is it our doubt, our insecurity, our pride and ego? It will be a different answer for each of us.

For those who enjoy reading, especially poetry, the more we know about the author and the circumstances of the published works, the more we will learn and enjoy. The history of Isaiah, given in my Bible, is too brief. Imagine how rich his writings will really be if I knew more the life and times of the author.

I possess many faults Lord, have patience and help me to follow your words.

February 20, 2009 Saturday

 We are Accepted

Just imagine the shock of the Pharisees, imagine the joy of the tax collectors with our Lord’s breathtaking move in today’s Gospel. God has acted – imperfection, human weaknesses are accepted. God forgives.

Tax collectors were greatly disliked, even hated. Each had a fixed amount to collect. Funds retrieved above this amount were their profit. With the power of Rome behind their thievery, they became wealthy and despised.

A door was opened that day.  They, we all belong – together. Hopefully we all can say “Here is a God that accepts our humanness. We are who we are”. As one who always felt like an outsider, this is wonderful! When I first became ill, good friends and family accepted me. I belonged somewhere. With this acceptance, the healing began.

Lord, for those who feel alone, let them be wanted, welcomed and giving.

Articles published in My Daily Visitor

February 1, 2010 Monday

Mixed Results?

What a way to start of a month with this Gospel. There is much activity here. We have a man possessed by a host of demons, their destruction by trickery and the drowning of someone’s herd of swine. No one is completely satisfied. The healed man’s desire for discipleship is rejected and the villagers reject Jesus and spiritual salvation.  But a seed has been planted; the healed one is told to preach the word of his amazing cure.

Life’s desires and accomplishments are never truly fulfilled. A job, a new book, a hobby, loses their appeal after a short time. There is a restlessness deep inside of me. This material incompleteness increases my desire to find true fulfillment; the true mystery of life. “Our hearts will never rest until they rest in thee.”

Lord, help me to seek satisfaction in what I have and obtain only what’s needed.

February 2, 2010 Tuesday

Perseverance

Were Simeon and Anna the last of the prophets – witnesses to the Messiah after centuries of struggle and self-preservation? How long have they been waiting? Did they doubt? Did they question? How many of us would have persevered? I certainly could not have. Even now, I am tempted to take a break from writing. Even now, my thoughts are unfocused away from the present. The fears of what has not occurred or may never occur, haunts me. The words ‘Do not be afraid” ring shallow. “Do not worry” feels like an impossibility. At times my faith is weak, but I have the writings and words of some very great people who went before. Spirituality, faith must be constantly be nourished – fed a good diet of meditation, contemplation, reading and serving.

Holy Spirit, be present in times of struggle and may I be silent and welcoming

February 3, 2010 Wednesday

 What’s not seen

 Were you ever too close to a situation that you could not properly judge – that you could not see the forest because of the trees? Our narrow human ‘vision’ gets in the way. Due to some sort of prejudices, stubbornness or pride, the closer one is to a particular situation the more difficult it might be to see what may truly be present. In today’s Gospel, the people of Jesus’ native town are victims of their own narrow vision.

The saints of the early church may have left us an incomplete written record, but their efforts are the unseen foundation on which we grow today. Every now and then say a little prayer of thanks as today we honor Saint Ansgar and the more popular Saint Blaise. They are worth a quick Google search.

Lord, have patience with my limits and help me accept them and grow.

February 4, 2010 Thursday

 Basic Training

I don’t remember the first time I had to take care of my newborn son, some 18 years ago, but my anxiety must have been pretty high. Hopefully, I paid attention to the nurses the doctor and my wife.

Imagine what the twelve felt, in today’s reading, as our Lord sent them out in pairs to preach and heal.  They were told to take nothing and had only the companionship of a fellow disciple. At least I had plenty of baby supplies and the telephone. For them, like myself, there must have been plenty of trepidation.

Like any new responsibility, there is both pride in receiving the task at hand as well as anxiety in taking on the new chore. For our twelve, this was another step in training for when Christ departs.

With new responsibilities, stand beside me Lord, as I struggle with these challenges and opportunities.

February 5, 2010 Friday

Perseverance and Resolve

Today, as we celebrate another saint of the early Church, Saint Agatha, I cannot help but notice one common characteristic our Saints possess. Whether they are the members of the early Church or today’s Church, they each have an internal strength or resolve – brought about by the powerful Faith given to them from the Holy Spirit.

When I started writing today’s passage, I needed inner strength to face another struggle brought by mental illness. Part of the brain is bombarding me with fearful thoughts and images of things yet to be and may never be. Another crisis, forcing me to seek my therapist for an unscheduled visit. With her, I will review the tools to use and try to rewire these neuron-pathways. A process that can take years of struggle.

Lord, help me face these inner challenges. Give me the strength to persevere.

February 6, 2010 Saturday

 Did it make a difference?

Today we honor the martyrs Brother Paul Miki and his unnamed companions who gave the ultimate, but sometimes I wonder was it worth it. Christianity did not take hold in the way we would expect. But is that the only goal? Would they have been considered failures in our society?

Fortunately, God works by His rules, outside our time and space not via any bottom line. Rarely will we know the results of our labors. The fruits of a good deed, a nice word, may be forever hidden. Our culture is result oriented. There is this profit motive dictating ones actions and success – nothing in between. Goodness is buried beneath profit. A sad truth, so we must become more than just the end product.  Our Christianity must rise above what’s perceived as successful.

Help me to remember Lord that Christianity stands apart from any bottom line.

February 7, 2010 Sunday

 The Ego

I wonder how often pride and stubbornness get in the way of our lives. In today’s Gospel, I see by Peter‘s quick conversion as the result of human pride being overcome.  Imagine an entire day without a single fish caught (of course planned by our Lord), exhausted, smelling and tired, being told to try it all over again. This Peter, fully competent and self-assured is being told by this stranger who may never had spent a day at sea – how to fish. Like a first grader telling me, a former accountant, how to balance my checkbook.

In Peter’s situation, this pride and hardheadedness magnify the beauty of his relationship with Our Lord.  Throughout the Gospel, we see him constantly battle his pride, and stubbornness. His weaknesses/human tendencies conquered, Peter becomes our foundation.

Lord, help me see how ego, interferes with my true self.

February 8, 2009 Monday

Twist and Turns

The Saints’ lives that we celebrate today cannot be defined as atypical. One a slave, the other a soldier – both paths leading unexpectantly to God. A surprise for all except for Him. How beautiful, diverse and difficult were their lives.

Who among us expected their lives to be at the present now? I have not, especially with my medical condition. We plan, God laughs or at least smiles at human folly and foolishness. We must be flexible and remember those who turned sour grapes into wine. I think of Police Officer Steven McDonald, paralyzed from the neck down from a teenager’s bullet some 23 years ago.  He still wears the badge and lectures on forgiveness. I too must try and let God direct me. Bend like a palm tree with roots of an oak.

When the unexpected occurs, Lord, help me see with gratitude the gains that can result.

February 9, 200 Tuesday

 Tradition without Meaning and Understanding

 In one of my group sessions, someone was describing how every year their grandmother would cut the legs off the Thanksgiving Turkey before placing it in the oven.  No one knew the reason why – it was just done that way. Explanations were always given until one day someone asked Grandma. Her answer, “The pan was not big enough.”

That’s what happened with the Pharisees and scribes. There was action without meaning. A routine became tradition without heart.  Worse of all, these ’traditions’ led to hypocrisy, and pride. Through generations, the elders lost their way and became bogged down with rituals. These rituals then became obsessions. (As one with Obsessive Compulsion Disorder, I know how easy it is for rituals to become all controlling) The Faith of Abraham had taken a wrong turn.

Lord, help me take the proper road when rituals become a power unto themselves.

February 10, 200 Wednesday

 Sticks and Stone

Inside all of us, there is a battle being waged and our words mirror our soul.  I remember the complaints received and the criticisms hurled. As our souls and hearts are human and therefore impure and imperfect, what comes out can also be defiling. Remember when we were kids, there was this saying that “Sticks and Stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me”. Well, Jesus had it correct all along – words can hurt.

The Saint we honor today has been over shadowed in history by her more popular twin brother, Benedict. As a child, I remember how I was over shadowed by my brothers’ successes. We will experience that sometime in our lives. What we should remember, as Christians, the times when we overshadow someone else and their accomplishments.

Help me, Lord, to remember how my actions and words may affect another.

Articles published in My Daily Visitor

February 22^nd, 2008 Friday Feast of the Chair of St. Peter

A Part to Play

Today we honor the choosing of St. Peter as the head of the Church – here on Earth. Even when present in their midst, the apostles, disciples, and followers, were confused of our Savior’s true identity, except for Peter. Gruff, denying and finally redeemed, Peter, like Paul and the many Saints who follow seem to be unwise choices. They do not fit into the human conception of one who can change the world.

One can be trained for various leadership skills, but only God opens those unlikeliest souls. We all are asked to lead in some way or another, to shoulder responsibility, as a Christian should. We may not lead anything as Holy or magnificent as the Church, but we all have some part to play starting with our family and the church family.

Lord, help me to carry the responsibility and burdens of being a Christian.

February 23^rd, 2008 Saturday St. Polycarp, Bishop & Martyr               

A Saint and Being Human

Of the Second Century, St Polycarp was a disciple St. John the Apostle. Only one of his letters survives, but does that really make a difference? Actions and faith kept his love and reputation alive, proving deeds can be greater than anything written. Another early pillar of our church, his courage and persistence withheld the forces of paganism and brutality, finally dying at the remarkable age of 86 by martyrdom.

At some time or other in our life we can place ourselves as either of the two sons. My life experiences have placed me in both situations: as lost son and the unappreciative son. Have we become gluttonous over certain desires and objects? Have we not squandered opportunities? Have we not taken so much for granted such as our faith, health, friends, and conveniences?

Lord, have patience. Guide me through days and thoughts of unfaithfulness and failure of appreciation.

February 24^th, 2008 Sunday

The Samaritans were outcast. They did not belong to the Jewish world. Conversing with them was an outrageous act. But Jesus seeks the outcasts. He seeks us. We are all outsides, alone in some way. The Church draws us all to her. We are welcomed, me with my mental handicap, others with physical, emotional, and spiritual weaknesses.

As I once had pointed out, the words of Jesus did not speak to the woman were as heavy and important as those spoken. As unmarried and living with a man, she was in sin, but our Lord understood, that to leave this man’s house, death through poverty and illness would soon follow. This Samaritan’s acceptance and understanding of the faith, the Word, brought her to the light. She understood more than others and Jesus understood her circumstances.

Let not what holds me back from society, Lord, keep me from you.

February 25^th, 2008 Monday

 A Reason for the Way

In Kings, the General Naaman, doubts why he must go through a cleansing ritual to be heeled. I too wonder why certain actions must be undergone to reach certain conclusion. Theologians come up with explanations but I still wonder why.

Through life, we must follow procedures. For homes repairs, I did not understand why my father always followed a certain order. When I started to bake, I didn’t comprehend why one mixes certain ingredients in a certain order. I still don’t. Of course, we all hopefully learn by mistakes and the extra mess.  Follow the written directions, be neat; at the end we will find the reasons – with no parts left over. There are rules we must follow. We somehow create a mess of things, but Jesus sets the guidelines & redeems us.

Life is full of clutter, messiness, Lord; help me keep my priorities straight.

February 26^th, 2008 Tuesday

The Power of One Act.

Forgiveness, probably the toughest thing one must do. The greater the offence, the more difficult the forgiveness. Forgiveness frees us from the ties of Satan – anger, retribution, hate. It enables the soul to continue on this journey; forgiveness opens the soul to wonderful possibilities. It confirms our humanity, our Christianity, the endless boundaries of love.

To be a disciple is to love, to let go of offenses and the past. Ask those who forgave great trespasses upon themselves and their families, they will tell you of how they moved forward and grew.  Ask NYC Police Officer Steven McDonald paralyzed from the neck down by a teenager’s bullet.  For twenty years he has been preaching forgiveness, love and faith. That’s a true disciple, freedom through faith. The greatest act of courage in my lifetime.

Instill in me, Lord, the strength, courage to forgive others, to be a true Christian.

February 27^th, 2008 Wednesday

Rabbi, Teacher

Teaching is a tremendous skill, a respected position in many societies. It is to influence, enlighten the mind and soul of another. The wisdom and knowledge imparted affects not just the student, but also their circle of family and friends. To imprison the mind, imprison the teachers.  See Europe of the 1930’s. To teach the commandments is to teach love and respect.

To remember those who taught, who passed on wisdom and knowledge is a great homage. We may think of our formal education when discussing teaching, but I remember my uncles, aunts, grandparents, who taught us how to fish, cook, and family traditions. May I never forget the great responsibility that must be undertaken for those to follow. May I remember how easy it is to pass on false beliefs as well.

Lord, let me know what to teach, what not, and how to teach.

February 28^th, 2008 Thursday

Ignorance is Death

The last line stands out. It is harsh and uncomfortable. One cannot be neutral, Jesus tells us in Luke. We are human with our frailties and doubts; however, we cannot go through the gift of life without comprehending the spiritual. The power of the physical world is overwhelming, but we must look beyond ourselves. We belong to the community, and to the spiritual world.

With the disability I carry, the phrase “get out of yourself” is usually applied to me. The issue is not me or my cross. Inner reflection does not begin and end with the self.  Our crosses must lead us by helping others to Him. Acceptance is key. Acceptance is belonging. We are not just passing through life. Obligation, duty, love and respect cannot be ignored. The Commandments apply to all.

Lord, I am week in mind and spirit, Strengthen my path to the Blessed Trinity.

February 29^th, 2008 Friday

I wonder whatever happened to the scribe. Did he become a disciple? Was he with the crowd on Palm Sunday or part of the group calling for Our Lord’ execution on Good Friday? I hope, like the rest of us, he found the light, that acceptance was on his lips as he lay dying.

The word ‘love’ has lost its power in this culture. It is overused and misused. We use this word for things, places, events. The power is gone. Love is something grand. A word that should be spoken wisely, sparingly. As an emotion it must travel with the wind, as the highest act of human behavior. The greatest one can do is to love, as Mother Theresa has loved.  I can never love you Lord, as much as You love us.

Help me to love my cross, Lord and others for it leads to You.

End